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Holly Grove Cemetery Part 2
The road to the cemetery was dark and lonely and seemed to go on endlessly. The closer we got to our destination, the more I asked myself if I could really do this. My mom's grave was closer to the edge of the cemetery, but still, this was a cemetery and it was pitch black out here.
Out loud, I told Alex the story of the Holly Grove Baptist Church and how my mom came to be buried here. The church had been donated to the Holly Grove Community by our ancestors and the land beside it was to be used as a family cemetery for their descendants. Everyone buried in the cemetery was a member of our family and we had no reason at all to be afraid.
Until my mother's death in 1992, I had no idea we had "family." She died in Dallas and we were not sure where she would be buried. We had all been raised in Chicago and barely saw our Tennessee relatives. They contacted my brother and told him there was a place for her in the family cemetery.
And so she returned home to her birthplace to be buried. Her parents and grandparents are buried here, too. The more I thought about it and talked about it, the less I feared it. Aunts, uncles, cousins, great grandparents--people that would have loved us if they had known us--that's who we were coming to see.
We pulled up into the church parking lot and prepared to get out. There was no gate to the cemetery. It was just there, next to the church. Suddenly I felt like I was glued to my seat. All that talk about how safe we were, and now I was scared. Really scared. But I had told Alex I wanted this and he had been so generous in setting aside his fears. How could I back out now?
It was too dark. I told Alex we needed light, so I backed up and pointed the headlights toward the cemetery. And there they were. Headstones! Row after row of headstones. I knew there was no way I could get out of the truck and walk out there among them. No way!
I searched for my mom's stone. I didn't see it. I thought I'd remembered exactly where it was, but it didn't seem to be there. That scared me even more. How could it be gone? It was a huge stone. How could I not see it? I pulled up a little closer, almost in the cemetery now, but still couldn't see it. I was going to have to get out if I wanted to find it.
Then Alex asked me if we could just stay in the truck. "Yes. Yes, we can," I told him. "In fact, we can even go now, if you want." He wanted. We quickly left and I never had to admit how scared I was. Of course he'll find out now, once he reads this.
Even though I didn't get to see the stone, or have a little talk with my mother, I felt like she knew we were there. I'm pretty sure they all knew we were there. I can almost see them now, waiting and whispering and hoping, "Please have the nerve to walk out here!"
Sorry, I couldn't resist.
next - Forrest City, Arkansas
or see the index a little farther down this page
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